It's not even 5 o'clock

This has been one of the busiest weeks of my life. Am I stressed? grumpy? thinking about joining the circus? lighting a match to my textbooks?
No! I'm absolutely loving every minute of it. I've been up at 6 or before for the past three days and overnight nannying in addition to daytime nannying. But I love- it, because packing your schedule full of commitments and responsibilities stretches you. It proves to you that you're capable of so much more than you think you are. Responsibility is just an opportunity to get to know yourself better.

It's not even 5 o'clock, I have zero classes on Wednesdays, and I've watched absolutely zero television and I feel that I've learned so much...
- a man told me about what life was like here during the vietnam war at the hospital this morning
- I got to read an entire fortune magazine- I'll be spending my time on the khan academy website watching biology tutorials. This finally trumps sporcle.com
- I learned the best way to let two 4 year old girls drink chocolate milk is straight from a bowl like kitty cats
-that sarah peters is one of the kindest, most encouraging, and interesting indivdiuals I know...even at 7 o'clock in the morning
- that the homeless sell quarters for a dollar downtown. I imagine it's almost lucrative. I absolutely never have quarters for parking meters. I paid 2 dollars for 2 quarters.
-that perhaps kids shouldn't be scolded or threatened into doing what you tell them to do. chasing them down with a can of silly string works wonder. and it's a lot of fun.
- that pretend weddings consist of crowns, wands, purses, silly bandz, barbies, and glitter. woody, from toy story also attends. watching ella and her playdate mary frances have the time of their lives getting ready for their weddings made me wonder- perhaps I should have all these essential elements at mine?
- playing dress up still rocks.
-the study abroad office still has the magnetic devices that drive me crazy because I can't stack them all up in a straight line. over all...trips there at still not enjoyable.  study abroad is life changing and amazing...someone over there should at least be a little bit excited about it.
-enthusiasm is my favorite thing to encounter. especially in strangers.
- a man told me about the costa rica trip he works with- and you could just tell that he loved it. I'm tempted to go and I know hardly anything about it.

Enthusiasm really could change the world.

twenty one

It's been a weekend of birthday celebrations, homecoming festivites, celebration of dear friends winning two crowns, dance parties, dance classes, cooking new foods, a trip to the county fair, a ride on the ferris wheel, and overall joy and silliness.

graceful

 I always end up distracted during study hours because I feel the need to stretch and once I start...I can hardly quit. I suddenly become aware of how tight everything else in my body feels and I just love pushing past the initial pain until it becomes comfortable.

I've always wished that I could be a ballerina. Not a "baller"rina- but a timeless, classical, graceful ballerina. I took ballet for a few years growing up, along with tap and jazz and just about every other childhood activity you can think of (I rarely stuck with anything longer than a year or two). Ramsey offers ballet classes and I am just dying to take one. Along with a hip hop class. But they are COMPLETELY different. I have to take both. Sometime before I graduate. I think I'd really like to take ballet even after college.  I mean, why not?

Mostly, this just makes me think of how in high school.....get ready for this....I WANTED to be awkward. Somewhere, someone, or something implanted in my brain that awkwardness was desirable. It seemed more "real" and made you more approachable. Perhaps it was a little too much Seth Cohen. So, I actually tried to intimate awkward movements. I already said and still say the wrong thing at the wrong time and to the wrong person and all of that. I have that down pat.  But I've never been clumsy and I wanted to be!

Isn't it crazy how as different points in our lives we dislike the silliest things about ourselves? I use to hate being taller than every one else and my long skinny legs. Nowadays? I would LOVE to grow a few more inches.

I used to beg my mom to let me high light my almost black hair blonde. Blonde high lights? Are you kidding me?  I also had a color contact phase. Along with a sunless tanner phase. Now I wouldn't trade my black hair and light brown eyes for anything else. I've learned to love myself exactly the way that the Lord made me.

Since everybody is an individual, nobody can

 

be you. You are unique. Your life is your own.

 

You mold it. You make it. - Eleanor Roosevelt

via-www.nouvellesimages.com

frustrated

I'm FRUSTRATED.

I just bought a half gallon of coffee icecream. I'm not sure if this is the first step in the right direction but it certainly feels like it.

for you I'd write a symphony

waiting for sunrise

 I'd absolutely love to be back here right now...

Tonight is one of those times, where I'm all curled up in my bed, I'm completed relaxed, there's no school tomorrow, I'm not working tomorrow, and it's 3 43AM and I'm nothing but anxious for night time to hurry up and end. I can't wait for tomorrow. I want it to be here now. I want to go ahead and jump in the shower and start tomorrow...but I can't because it's still the middle of the night and there's nothing I can but wait for sunrise.